Skip to main content

I have been Used By, Compromised Many Times too. I am Setting Myself Free. Are you Setting Yourself Free?

Life has many phases. You have to go through all of them. The day you are born till the day you die, you would have spent your life in both measurable and immeasurable experiences. Most of the times, the thing that often comes in mind, is how much you tolerated or compromised yourself for the other person. It doesn't matter what was the position of that person and yours too at that point of time.
There always comes a point when one says that yes, I am not able to compromise anymore. It can be due to your observing the things from another person's perspective or because of your own, open-eyed perspective to which you were one blind way long back.


I-have-had-enough-now-not-anymore

Whatever the case may be, a time comes when you feel that you have been weighed down all the time till now and your compromises are just looked down as you being a weak, loser kind of a person. The result, a big blow to your self-esteem, self-confidence, in short, to your self-worth!

It happens in everybody's life. You feel dejected, unloved, disliked by all not because you are but because the image created by you by your compromises, sacrifices for others is like that of a weak person. The perception created is such that others simply start taking you for granted.

What can you do if stuck in such a situation? I have been in this situation a lot many times but now, I feel that its high time to stop thinking on it and do something about this and I would like to share it with you all below -

1. Realization

The very first step in this process is to realize that yes, it is the actual problem for which you are seeking a solution. The point here is to be conscious. If you don't realize it, you will keep repeating your actions subconsciously.

If you observe closely, even a doctor can't treat your illness till the time you realize or accept that yes, you have a problem. Realization is the first and foremost thing if you want to get out of this feeling once and for all.

2. Draw the line

Once you have realized that you have a problem of compromising every time and have a feeling of being used, simply sit down with a piece of paper and write down your traits for which you feel you usually feel being used or it's in your nature to compromise for.

If you recall and write down these situations, you will be able to draw the line to what is the limit up to which you can tolerate it and what happens if you go beyond that.

3. Learn to say the word 'No'

The word 'No' is in the English dictionary for a purpose, so make use of it. What you are currently doing is following 'Yes theory'. The point here is not saying yes at all but when you really need to.

Learn to say no to things which you really don't like doing or want to stay away from all the time. Yes, there will come the time when you have to face the situations or the people that make you uncomfortable but that would not be frequent. Moreover, a little discomfort is also necessary as it tests your limits.

So start saying no and see what difference it makes overall.

4. Weigh your priorities

People, especially in India as I have observed are very discouraging. Earlier, I used to get very sad, depressed by such behaviors of them but now, as the times have changed, I am neutral and sometimes laugh at some of them. I don't let them affect my thinking.

The reason why I am able to do that is that I simply realize that they can't match my wavelength. It's like saying, we all sleep under the same sky but we all see it through different eyes.

Weighing your priorities helps you in many ways especially the impact of what that person is saying to you.

5. Don't run away

This is essential. The main thing about all of this is that you can't run from the truth. Take responsibility for your actions and accept that you also played a role in being compromised or used as you think you are. You allowed yourself too to some extent whether consciously or subconsciously into acting the way you wanted to act.

This way you could keep a track of your actions and train your subconscious accordingly. You would be able to say that I have had enough and I am not born to compromise. That day, you will set yourself free.

Is there a time when you felt that you have had enough and want to get away with it? Share your experiences in the comments section below.

Photo by Ian Espinosa on Unsplash

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Meet our Desi Superhero … here comes A Flying Jatt! 10 reasons to watch the film on Zee Cinema on 22 Oct@8PM

 Zee Cinema is showing the movie A Flying Jatt, starring Tiger Shroff this weekend. Though I wanted to watch this movie with my nephew and niece but I was not able to. But, this weekend I am surely going to enjoy the movie with the kids. Below are the 10 reasons to watch this film: 1.        India’s first flying Superhero India’s first flying superhero – A Flying Jatt saves the day in the coolest way. Bestowed not only with this incredible superpower our man can also display some jaw-dropping martial art moves. 2.        This Superhero has a Supermom Most of the superheroes that we know pledge to save the world and have lost their parents to an accident. But this super hero has a supermom who constantly reminds him of his duties. A typical Indian mother, she scolds him every time his reluctant to use his superpowers. She definitely is a supermom! 3.        Powers + Killer dance moves = Legendary Superhero You might be Superman or Batman but one th

Finally, love is arranged........by god!

'Welcome to Melbourne' a voice echoed as the plane landed at the Melbourne airport. There was a hustle and bustle as the passengers started removing their luggage from the cabin compartment. Pankhuri was delighted. She performed all the formalities of arrival, claimed her luggage, hired a taxi and left for the hotel. She had to stay in a hotel for first few days till all the formalities for her admission at the university were completed and the hostel allocated to her. She reached the hotel at around 10 in the morning. A blonde man with blue eyes, wearing a Grey suit who sat at the reception welcomed her. 'Welcome to the Melbourne Marriot, Ma'am. Here is your room card.' He said giving a swipe card to her. 'Thank you, Could you please arrange someone to fetch my luggage to the room?' she asked importantly. 'Sure!' he said. 'Thanks!' she smiled and left for the room. The room was scented with a sweet aroma. The l

I wish this night stayed....

Cold breeze grazing my feet Maybe it's an act so folly But my heart skipped a beat Surrounded by sheer melancholy Your whispers echoing in my ears Its difficult to see with Eyes welling up with tears Heart aching in writhe Winds changed the direction again Waiting for this since quite long No more I can abstain Come let's dance to the song Beneath the open sky Beside you I laid Now don't say bye I wish this night stayed... Check out the poem Just you and I... Image source: here